Drunk Clint
by Iron cheeks
Summary: Clint comes home to Natasha and his apartment drunk. Oneshot Clintasha


Natasha looked up from her book as she heard fumbling at the door. Clint bursted in and nearly fell with the swing of the door.

"Door tried to keep me out. I got the keys", Clint announced as he threw the keys onto the table beside the door. He took a step back to balance himself.

"Hey little lady", Clint searched his pockets as he called to Natasha. "Hey pretty lady. Guess who's back", Clint stumbled forward a little more. Natasha smirked at him. She hadn't seen him this drunk in a while.

"I want..I want a kiss on my mouth and sex on my body", Clint told her as he leant against a chair. Natasha walked up to him and put her arms on his waist.

"Aww you went to a gentlemen's club and you came home a gentleman", Natasha smiled at him and ran a hand over his chest. Natasha turned away from him to get Clint a bottle of water and painkillers.

"Hey check it out. Million dollar idea. Urinals in taxi cabs. It's like your..your peeing anyway", Clint shrugged. "Why would you do that? Why would you do that?"

"Hey listen. Shh. Shut up!" Clint wanted Natasha's attention. "Oh", Natasha said out of slight shock. Clint took Natasha's hands in his.

"Why won't you marry me?" Natasha paled slightly. She had to remind herself that it was the drink talking. He wouldn't remember any of this.

"Woah", Natasha responded.

"Nat listen. I know I never asked you that question because I know how much it annoys you. But I was out with the guys tonight and we were drinking and having a fun time. I had to pretend that I was so cool with not marrying you. Hello, that's not what I'm in here for. I don't, I won't, I hate that and I hate you", Clint chuckled.

"Yo, just kidding I want to marry you", Clint smiled at her. Natasha laughed slightly. Clint dropped to one knee.

"Oh my god. You're not. Are you proposing right now?" Natasha asked him. All the ways that people could use their marriage against them flashed through Natasha's mind.

"Uhh no, the rooms spinning", Clint held his head with one hand her hand the other. Natasha laughed slightly.

"It has nothing to do with proposing. Sike. Will you marry me?" Clint pointed at her and used his other hand to steady himself. Natasha sighed, "God Clint".

"Why can't you just say yes? You never say yes", Clint rambled on. "Clint", Natasha held his hand and smiled at him.

"It doesn't matter what I say. It doesn't. Nat, Nat I'm pregnant". Natasha laughed slightly.

"Okay I..." Natasha tried to talk.

"Listen just zip it dude", Clint made a zipping motion across his lips, "will you marry me? Please I wanna marry you. Will you marry me? Will you marry me? I mean will you marry me?"

Natasha faced him in a slightly awkward silence. Clint ran his hand down her back.

"We can have sex sure, but don't jostle me", Clint said as he wrapped Natasha's arms around him and led them into the bedroom.

"Oh Clint", Natasha said as she was walked behind him. Clint grabbed the bowls off the shelf.

"Bringing the bowls, bringing the bowls", Clint chanted. Natasha struggled slightly but got them out of his grip and placing them on a different table.

Natasha undone Clint's belt from behind as Clint walked towards the bed.

"Hey get off me pants mister. My wife wants me", Clint said as he collapsed onto the bed.

"Hey I told you once and I told you twice. Get off my legs", Clint mumbled as Natasha helped him into bed. Clint pulled his face off the pillow.

"I'm just gonna be honest. I wanna put my hand up your shirt", Clint smiled at her, "but it's okay I'm not much of boob guy. Barney is a boob guy. I'm more of an ass guy. That's why we make such a great team", Clint adjusted the pillow under his head and put his arm under it to hold his head up. Natasha took off his shoes.

"I feel like you might miss Barney a little bit", Natasha said as she tucked him in.

"I'm gonna leave this trash can in here for you", Natasha held it up for him to see.

"Yeah love the trash can", Clint cuddled up to the covers. "I don't want to say he completes me, because you complete me. He borrows the nuts and cranes".

Clint held onto Natasha's hand as he looked up to her again.

"Oh, let's make toast dude". Natasha laughed. Clint sat up onto his elbows.

"I'm uh I wanna be honest with you. I wanna put my hand under your shirt", Clint told her again. Natasha smiled at him. "So jury says you let me do that", continued Clint. Natasha shook her head slightly as Clint lay back down and found the seam of he pillow case beside him.

"Yeah", he grinned as he reached his hand into the pillow. "Found it". Natasha shook her head laughing and left him to sleep.

Thanks for reading xx


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